Wishing for My Troubles Back

I used to hate the rain, now I miss the storm

The endless nights of thinking kept my heart warm

Back when my worries felt like mountains to climb

Now I'm stuck in a loop, just wasting my time

I miss the fights that used to keep me awake

Now it's just silence and promises I break

I'm staring at my past like it's better than now

Trading peace of mind for a battle somehow

I want my troubles back, those midnight attacks

When life was heavy, but at least it was facts

Give me the pain that I used to know

Better the devil I danced with below

I'm lost in the calm, and I'm drowning in peace

Wishing for the chaos that gave me release

If this is the answer, then bury me

Is this the solution, then I want my problem back

Now my days feel empty, the world makes me sick

The scars on my heart are where I used to belong

I chased the light, but the darkness felt real

Now I'm left numb with nothing to feel

I want those battles, the wars in my head

Now it's just silence, and I'm wishing for red

Remember when we dreamed big, even if we failed

I miss the pressure, the weight on my chest

Back when I was broken but still at my best

Now it's all perfect, or so it seems

But I'm drowning in the echoes of my own dreams

I think I want my problem back

I'm staring at my past like it's better than now

Trading peace of mind for a battle somehow

I want my troubles back, those midnight attacks

When life was heavy, but at least it was facts

Give me the pain that I used to know

Better the devil I danced with below

I'm lost in the calm, and I'm drowning in peace

Wishing for the chaos that gave me release

If this is the answer, then bury me

Is this the solution, then I want my problem back

I used to be scared of losing my way

Now every right turn feels like a cliche

I thought I'd find freedom without the chains

But now all I feel is this numbing disdain

Bring me the nights I used to fight through

Give me the demons that I used to pursue

There's no thrill in the safety of these walls

I miss the missteps, the rise and the falls

All these blank pages and nothing to write

When life's too easy, it doesn't feel right

I need the friction, the fire, the burn

To feel like I'm living, I need to return

The future looks like an empty page of me

All the perfect endings, all the lines I've drawn

Still searching for the place where I went wrong

I want my troubles back, those midnight attacks

When life was heavy, but at least it was facts

Give me the pain that I used to know

Better the devil I danced with below

I'm lost in the calm, and I'm drowning in peace

Wishing for the chaos that gave me release

If this is the answer, then bury me

Is this the solution, then I want my problem back